For the past week, I have been thinking of doing an article like this. But, in that course of thinking, I felt as though no matter how hard I tried to find the concern of this post, I could not point my finger and narrow down the cause of all the things I see apprehensive and harmful to the world today. And sure, as Obi-Wan Kenobi once said, "Only a Sith deals in absolutes," which is partially true: just open a Bible; God has pretty strong absolutes. But then, in the car today, because this is what I think about during periods of transportation, it hit me: it is the lack of action, in both thinking and doing, that is causing most of the problems we see in the world today, especially personal.
Why did this occur to me? Well, several events have been in a chain going for a bit more than a week for me. I'll tell you what I mean.
It all started with a boy's happiest day: masks being optional in schools. I was excited, thrilled, elated, and in addition, happened to be angry at my state and county's board of education for having allowed this to go for so long, which I must say is a take well-supported.
And, after the annoying, mentally destructive, and ignorant policy which is mandatory masking was lifted, one would hypothesize that most would opt to tear their useless, cloth facial covering in a second, would they not? No. I would guess, based purely on sight during a week's worth of studying the outcome, which is grossly underestimated as a method in today's society against common sense, might I add, that only ten percent of students took theirs off. This is extremely depressing; there is no other way to put it.
Now, I would say there are three categories of non-maskers at my school: the general population which does not respect authority in the slightest, those who simply do not care and are often mediocre students, and the conservatives. I am in the latter group. Now, because I am a conservative Catholic and do not enjoy the company of liberal atheists, my two best friends that I can most identify with took off the mask, one vaccinated and one unvaccinated. They are both Christian and politically conservative.
The masks, at least for me, have become a humorous gag at my school. There is one person, who I would rather call a minor acquaintance than a friend, who I tell all the time to pull up his mask. For context, this is the guy that tried to tell me that a third of a billion people have died from COVID, which anyone with more than one brain cell would know is the most bald-faced lie on the planet. So, I, in a state of not wearing a mask, telling this masked ignoramus to pull it above his nose or else it would not work, and him refusing to, is hilarious because the conflict is so insanely contradictive to reason.
I perceived people differently without the mask on. My theater instructor, for instance, I would not identify with politically, surely. We typically like the same modes of art. I did not enjoy him as a person although I still thought he was smart. But, when the mask came off, I realized how much of a cheerful man he was, and that made him more affable to me. Recognize that I am not overanalyzing my own psyche: this is simply a natural reaction to a return to some form of normalcy proceeding that fact that it was stolen by bureaucrats for months.
Many saw me, and said, "Well, of course you'd be maskless." They were not wrong; I was rather unsurprised they were masked. It is very easy to determine who would make which choice based on their ideology and mindset. This is very obvious. Me and the previously mentioned unvaccinated friend are known as the most right-wing men at our school, no contest. I am the smart one and he is the strong one. People most often divide others using ideology as the main factor, therefore, we are often lumped together. This is an important point to make.
At my church, since the mandate was county-wide, masks became optional. It was fantastic and made the atmosphere all the more desirable. I picked up on something there as well. The priests, even though they had not been masked for the entire period of the law's existence because for some reason or another they could, did not wear it; most seniors did not wear facial coverings. My family walked into the church with masks, the only motive for my doing so was because my father did. My dad took his off early on, I believe because he felt more comfortable doing so when he got the visual. It was an easy decision for me to take mine off afterwards. My siblings did not, even though they noticed my dad's action.
This is all to say that wearing a mask, besides perhaps having added incentive to keep a sick or susceptible family member safe from the virus and having the mask be a relatively effective one, is a childish thing to do. It just is. What do very young children think of? Nothing. They cannot follow anything except their own instinct. And when they mature out of that stage at maybe four or so, they still do not have the capable intellect to philosophize or make morally conscious decisions. That does not come until probably seven or so. And when this happens, their reason is still impaired by lack of logical knowledge that might come in the early teenage years: you get the picture.
Children are often unreasonably fearful of pain, because it is their instinct to be afraid of pain. They can cry uncontrollably when they are hurt and have nothing out of the normal be present. When have the control to stop themselves though, they are expected only to contain what is unnatural and nothing more. It is unreasonable to be personally afraid of COVID-19 as anything but a senior. There is such a notion of due diligence with regard to personal decision making. I wear a seatbelt in the car and make sure I do not stick my hand down the garbage disposal when I turn it on. But, catching a cold is life.
You do not seek to get sick and you do not want others to get sick, sure. A virus though is simply an organism that will not head by your wishes. Why has the world never masked during flu season? Because somethings are stupid, pointless, and ineffective.
I, in the last three or so paragraphs, have used synonyms or conveyed the meaning of a word or phrase related to the word "reason." This is because reason is such a key part in being that it cannot be ignored.
There is an friend of mine. He is very unreasonable. Let me tell you why. Sure, he has good intentions, but does not bother to explore knowledge. I am not being morally superior in saying this: I can go on and on about my own wrongdoings. He claims to be both Catholic and Lutheran, which makes no sense; I have tried to introduce to him to resources such as Bishop Robert Barron and Matt Fradd's outlets, who I recommend to all of you. He has said he does not have a "good feeling" about them based on simple emotion, so he passed.
The Sacrament of Confirmation in the Catholic Church mirrors Pentacost in that the gifts of the Holy Spirit are given to the receiving individual through God's own works. He has been Confirmed and has claimed that the Holy Spirit speaks through him, which is why he says he can go off of instinct. I told him that three gifts of the Holy Spirit are Knowledge, Wisdom, and Understanding. He did not take the hint.
He attempts to be a mastermind in the economic sphere, somehow with no study. I am steadily working through Thomas Sowell's economically descriptive foothold, aptly titled Basic Economics. The first section's key understanding is that generally speaking, when a product lowers in price, more people buy it. I asked him whether more people buy a product if it is cheaper or more expensive, and he went with the latter option. I asked him that again, but then he went to talking about the housing market. He always interrupts me and is pushy about his beliefs. The takeaway? Don't be ignorant and morally superior. Use your higher judgement.
I wish to post a full review of Crime and Punishment soon, which is why I feel alright in spoiling the end right now. Raskolnikov, as I explained in my first post on the site, committed murder for the sake of doing it. A certain someone persuades him into turning himself in so his soul might be saved. He eventually does so and in the end, he goes through a trial, does not argue for his defense at all, and lands himself in a Siberian labor camp. To most, this would sound like a very unhappy ending for the protagonist. And to that, I would lead them to the last words of the book:
He did not even know that a new life would not be given to him for nothing, that it still had to be dearly bought, to be paid for with a great future deed...But here begins a new account, the account of a man's gradual renewal, the account of a man's gradual transition from one world to another, his acquaintance with a new, hitherto completely unknown presence of reality. It make the subject of a new story- but our present story is ended
This is the often referenced idea of redemptive suffering, salvation through working through one's troubles with the Almighty in mind. This book was possibly the most life-changing work of literature I have ever read. Punishment can be rehabilitative, if the punished makes it so.
Avoiding suffering will only lead to more suffering. This does not mean you should go throw yourself off a bridge right now; life is a gift from God. But live your life like God's servant Job did in the Old Testament. This story is often used as a proof that one could have an absolutely terrible life and live in that life with happiness. Why is this? Well, not everything is material.
And this is the crux of the matter: we are deluding ourselves into believing this world is all that we have to cling to. Some actively do it and some decide to put off thinking of this reality. This is ultimately why everyone wears a mask: false self-preservation or more justified preservation of others. After all, if you believed that a crummy house bought with withering paper money within a random country's borders on a green-blue sphere made of cosmic dust in a universe with unimaginable size was better compared to literal nothing, would not you want to desperately be on sphere, in the house? We do not feel at rest in this morally degraded society either. If you believed that sure, God existed, but hey, I am a total bad dude and I will never be able to reconcile with the people around me, nor myself or my God, then would not you wish to be in this world too?
I watched Alfred Hitchcock's 1960 thriller the other day. The plot concerns Norman Bates, a innkeeper whose mother lives in an old, decaying house. A woman named Marion, who has robbed a real estate customer thousands of dollars in cash, seeks refuge at the roadside Bates Motel. Norman meets her, and enjoys her company. And in the famous shower scene, violins pierce the ear as Norman's mother kills her. Norman discovers the body and is in very deep distress. He hides the body.
Marion's sister, Lila, and Marion's boyfriend, Sam, hire a private investigator to track down the sister that has run away. The P.I. goes to the motel on the road and suspects Norman had something to do with her mysterious appearance. He goes into the house while he is alone and believes he is not being watched. Once inside, the mother kills him too.
Lila and Sam then go to the Bates Motel. Norman meets them there. They also go into the house to examine the location. The sister ventures into the basement and finds a female corpse sitting in a chair. The same figure that killed Marion and the employed detective appears behind her, ready to strike. Sam luckily manhandles the individual and manages to stop them from killing Lila. A wig falls off: it had been Norman Bates along, dressed as his mother.
At the police station, a psychologist is given some speaking time, noting that Norman has finally descended into madness, believing that he is his mother. Here's how he described it:
Like I said... the mother... Now to understand it the way I understood it, hearing it from the mother... that is, from the mother half of Norman's mind... you have to go back ten years, to the time when Norman murdered his mother and her lover. Now he was already dangerously disturbed, had been ever since his father died. His mother was a clinging, demanding woman, and for years the two of them lived as if there was no one else in the world. Then she met a man... and it seemed to Norman that she 'threw him over' for this man. Now that pushed him over the line and he killed 'em both. Matricide is probably the most unbearable crime of all... most unbearable to the son who commits it. So he had to erase the crime, at least in his own mind. He stole her corpse. A weighted coffin was buried. He hid the body in the fruit cellar. Even treated it to keep it as well as it would keep. And that still wasn't enough. She was there! But she was a corpse. So he began to think and speak for her, give her half his life, so to speak. At times he could be both personalities, carry on conversations. At other times, the mother half took over completely. Now he was never all Norman, but he was often only mother. And because he was so pathologically jealous of her, he assumed that she was jealous of him. Therefore, if he felt a strong attraction to any other woman, the mother side of him would go wild. When he met your sister, he was touched by her... aroused by her. He wanted her. That set off the 'jealous mother' and 'mother killed the girl'! Now after the murder, Norman returned as if from a deep sleep. And like a dutiful son, covered up all traces of the crime he was convinced his mother had committed!
The town Sheriff tried for the plain explanation that Norman was a transvestite, but the doctor said it was not so:
Ah, not exactly. A man who dresses in women's clothing in order to achieve a sexual change, or satisfaction, is a transvestite. But in Norman's case, he was simply doing everything possible to keep alive the illusion of his mother being alive. And when reality came too close, when danger or desire threatened that illusion - he dressed up, even to a cheap wig he bought. He'd walk about the house, sit in her chair, speak in her voice. He tried to be his mother! And, uh... now he is.
And then, the final lines of the movie from Norman's perspective, or rather, from his mother's:
It's sad, when a mother has to speak the words that condemn her own son. But I couldn't allow them to believe that I would commit murder. They'll put him away now, as I should have years ago. He was always bad, and in the end he intended to tell them I killed those girls and that man... as if I could do anything but just sit and stare, like one of his stuffed birds. They know I can't move a finger, and I won't. I'll just sit here and be quiet, just in case they do... suspect me. They're probably watching me. Well, let them. Let them see what kind of a person I am. I'm not even going to swat that fly. I hope they are watching... they'll see. They'll see and they'll know, and they'll say, "Why, she wouldn't even harm a fly..."
This is largely irrelevant, but I must say that the actor that plays Norman, Anthony Perkins, then gives the most evil smile in the scariest moment in television that I have ever seen.
Bates' case in different in that not everyone is a violent schizophrenic, but he did what we all do: invent excuses and cover up our own crimes. We pretend we do not commit them. Norman made an entire character to cover up his crime not in the real world, but in his mind. We do the same thing intellectually.
I witnessed this just yesterday. If you have read my work at the DNN, then you would know that the most ironic thing in my life is my biology teacher pretending to be a woman. At school, there was a walkout for the so-called "Don't Say Gay" bill in Florida, which I kid you not, was used by probably ninety-nine percent of the participants as an excuse to skip class. My teacher randomly commented on it. And then me and all of the reasonable people in the classroom banded together to discuss the bill in a supportive way. We believed that opposition to the bill was work of anti-parent pedophiles and that most of the health curriculum should be eliminated. We, in fact, went a step further. The teacher darted his eyes at us. I certainly did not care.
I had what I would describe as a panic attack two months ago. I was doing the routine of sending my teachers emails so that they would know I would miss their class for a doctor's appointment. I typed out "Ms." for the biology teacher's email header. I got very disturbed. I had very choppy, deep breathing for the next few minutes. I could not think of anything else. I could tell I was minorly traumatized by all the times I had called him, "her," him, "she," and addressed him as "Ms.," rather than "Mr." I had never had that kind of a reaction to that before.
There are two kinds of self-delusions, active and passive. One either has to forcibly contain the truth and drive themselves to all sorts of harmful spiritual and mental conditions, or ignore the truth. Both of these are driven by a lack of action to thoroughly examine oneself.
When either transpire, they only ever cause pain, loneliness, and despair. Our individual nature is how we interact with the world which means that when we are not right in ourselves, we harm others when we inflate our ego to the point where we will not even consider our own faults. I guess this what I am really getting at: pride, the deadliest of all sin's, the falling of mankind, not adhering to the section of the Lord's Prayer that declares "Thy Kingdom come; Thy Will be done, on Earth as It is in Heaven."
For the sake of feeling more comfortable in your own skin, like Norman Bates, or feeling as though you do not have to resort to attacks of the will on yourself and others, both of which are ways to reconcile with your Creator, a choice all of us are faced with, look inside that possibly dark void that is your own character.
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